Diagonalley Underground
by SilverSlippers77
Summary: A semi-AU based around Diagonalley Underground, a new Wizarding radio station.


_Please note: This story is an AU, so things aren't quite like they are in canon. This takes place post-DH however Remus, Tonks, and Fred are still alive. Arthur are Lucius dead. _**  
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**Evening News**

_Valeriana was quite looking forward to tonight's Diagonally Underground Evening News; there was supposed to be a special surprise tonight. After putting her young daughter to bed she went to the sitting room and dialed the station to 645 AM and then tapped her wand to the radio and said "Nitwit Oddment Blubber Tweak". One of Celestina's old classics blared out for a minute before the host's voice came on._

"Welcome back Witches and Wizards to your evening news hour on Diagonalley Underground. I'm your host, Lee Jordan. Tonight we have something very special planned. As many of you remember, I was part of a show called Potterwatch, and all of the other Potterwatch hosts happen to be with us tonight. That's right listeners, our Minister of Magic, Kingsley Shacklebolt has agreed to give us some live updates on some of the changes that are being made in the Ministry " Lee said in his usual upbeat and clear manner.

"As this is a special edition, all the previous Potterwatch hosts will be joining us for the news tonight; so I would also like to welcome Fred Weasley and Remus Lupin, both of whom you probably know from our stations' other programs" Angelina announced.

"Good Evening, Listeners" Remus said with a bit of a rasp

"'Evening, its nice to be on air with someone as marvelous as Miss Angelina" Fred greeted

"Hello. I'm Kingsley Shacklebolt, your Minister of Magic, known on Potterwatch as Royal, and I'm delighted to be back on the air with the old crew" Kingsley said in a deep and almost booming voice (re-read)

"That is really good to hear from you all and to have the old crew together again; but before we can discuss the changes in government that Minister Shacklebolt has been behind we need to cover some recent news items." Lee said

"Unfortunately our first item of news is not pleasant; last night a group of renegade Death Eaters attacked a muggle home outside of Plymouth. Three people were killed and seven others suffered injuries before Aurors arrived on the scene. They captured two Death Eaters, but believe there was a third who escaped." Angelina stated

"The muggles killed were Jeff and Jane Ellis, and their friend, Oliver Herman. They will be missed by their friends, family and neighbors. "Lee announced in a rather solemn tone, before going on, "Five of the injured have been treated and released from St. Mungo's with their memories modified, while two others remain in more serious condition. All damages to buildings should be repaired within the week."

"Muggle Police were told that the incident was caused by a group of arsonists and have been warned that there is still one loose who is carrying a gun." Angelina added

"While Voldemort is dead, these renegade Death Eaters are still out there and eager to cause trouble, so I urge all of you to remain cautious and to keep an eye on your muggle friends and Neighbors. As before, a few well placed shield charms can save quite a few lives." Kingsley commented

"This is much the same as it was last time," Remus added "And, unfortunately, it may go on for another year or so. The war may be over but we still have a long ways to go."

"This is most unfortunate; " Lee commented, before going on to the next item of news. "On a more positive note, Diagonalley repairs are going on according to schedule and most stores are now open again. However because of the aforementioned renegade Death Eater activity and general public fears, there is increased security and all shops are closing at or before 9 pm" Lee stated.

"This increased security, while unpleasant, is going to be around until things calm down a bit more" Angelina added

"The there is an Auror and three law enforcement agents patrolling Diagonalley at all times, all of which have been screened corruption and have been confirmed to have not collaborated with the previous regime's programs" Kingsley added.

"I can certainly tell from personal observation that people are going out more – our shop's in-store sales have been up quite a bit over the past few weeks. People are starting to feel that it is safer to leave their homes" Fred commented

"Also pleasantly, a number of Britian's Quidditch teams are reconvening. The Appleby Arrows, The Falmouth Falcons, and The Holyhead Harpies all claim to be ready to play again while Puddlemere United, The Chudley Cannons, and The Tutshill Tornados, have all stated that they will be ready within the month, so we could very well be seeing Quidditch matches back up and running soon" Angelina announced

"Now that's good news, after all, what is life as a wizard without Quidditch?" Fred commented

"Thank you Angelina for that update. However now I think it is time we take a brief break and after that our Minister of Magic will give us some information on the recent goings on with the Ministry.' Lee stated

The conversation then cut out and the radio switched to a pre-recorded musical advertisement for the Leaky Cauldron that highlighted their new bacon related dishes.

"Welcome back! And now, as promised, I would like to allow Minister Shacklebolt to discuss more recent goings on with the Ministry of Magic." Lee Jordan announced after they were back on the air.

"Thank you Lee. The Ministry has made many changes over the past few months; first and foremost is that every change made under Pius Thickenese has been removed - which of course included the disbandment dreadful Muggleborn Registration Commission." Kingsley replied

"Of course – what happened to those involved in its creation and implementation?" Angelina asked

"I was getting to that. We are in the process of carrying out the trials for those involved" Kingsley replied

"Which is already ten times better than last time – when the Ministry rarely bothered with a proper trial" Remus chimed in

"We are trying to avoid a repeat of last time." Kingsley said.

"Well duh" Fred added

"A few of the Registration Commission trials have been finished; I'm sure all of you read the piece in the papers about Dolores's Umbridge's sentencing" Kingsley stated.

"Old bat got what's coming to her for sure" Fred replied

"For a long time coming too. Minister Shacklebolt; I hear you have some other more recent changes with the Ministry to discuss" Lee commented, leading into the proper section of this segment.

"Yes, I do" Kingsley replied, "I think one of the most major changes that's been made over the past few months is the removal of the Dementors as Azkaban guards. All of the Dementors of Azkaban have been destroyed and have been replaced by some complex ward spells and human guards."

"That sounds much more humane." Angelina commented

"Those things always gave me the chills" Fred said with a shudder

"Exactly; and much safer considering how quickly the Dementors were to help Voldemort" Kinsley replied.

"And these changes are in place now?" Asked Lee

"Yes; The last of the ward spells was placed two weeks ago and there's always an Auror plus at least ten guards on station at all times" Kingsley replied

"And that's enough to stop any problem that arises?" Fred asked, trying to sound a bit unsure

"Yes; and if things do get out of hand the Auror on station can always call for backup; which can be there within minutes" Kingsley replied

"Which, in addition to the wards and the location should be more than enough security. I have confidence in our Aurors" Remus added

"Exactly – in addition to the removal of the Azkaban gaurds, we are currently in the process of banning the use of the Dementor's kiss as a punishment" Kingsley replied.

"Which truly no-one deserves" Remus replied rather quickly

"Not to mention no chance of reversal in the event they are later proven innocent" Angelina said.

"These changes in Azkaban are just some of the things we've been working on. Just last week; we revoked item 265 from the Werewolf Code of Conduct; which means that werewolves will now be allowed to be employed in public institutions. I've also asked for item 266 of the code to be modified to allow werewolves to work in muggle businesses with proper documentation" Kingsley stated

"Which is unexpectedly great; this could help get many people into more stable positions in life; which contrary to previous ministry rhetoric, reduces infection rates" Remus said.

"Exactly; especially considering the spate of new lycanthropy cases over the past few years" Kingsley added

"Which is certainly a concern; it's good to know that our new Ministry is taking actions to change the situation" Angelina commented

"Thank you; and Thank you to all the workers in the various offices who are helping to find and eradicate corruptions and injustices" Kingsley replied.

"Do you have any other programs to announce?" Lee asked

"Yes, I was getting to that. Just yesterday, the Ministry approved a program for helping Muggleborns displaced by the war." Kingsley stated

"To help them get a place to stay and a new job and all?" Fred asked

"Yes; this program will assist financially with finding a new place to live and organizationally by helping to reunite separated families." Kingsley replied

"This is up now?" Angelina asked

"Not quite; there are still a few kinks to work out legislatively, but it should be up and running by next week" Kingsley answered.

"Are there any other changes in the Ministry that you would like to tell us about?" Lee asked.

"Not right now; there are some more things we are working on but I am not yet at the liberty to divulge much. I will hopefully have more in our next interview" Kingsley answered

"Well, thank you Minister for telling us about some of the more recent updates within the Ministry" Lee said.

"And that concludes our show for this evening, stay tuned for Muggle Happenings with Andrew MacCarthy; if you miss Lee and I, come back at 8:00 AM for the morning news." Angelina said.

"Good night listeners" Lee said, which was followed by Angelina and each of the guests saying good night.

_The station then switched to a commercial for Auntie Lucille's Broom Polish Potion, guaranteed to increase speed by up to 10% on old, worn-out broomsticks._


End file.
